It's no secret I'm not a football fan, but many of you may not know why I hate it. I thought I'd share my feelings with you, since I know you all really care. ;)
1. The stupid games take forever. I mean, really!! You look in the TV Guide and it says the game will be on from 1 pm until 4 pm. Yeah, right. I can guarantee it's going to last until 5:30 because it's slow. I'll come into the room and see five minutes left on the clock in the fourth quarter. 30 minutes later I come back and there's still 1:45 left on the clock. For God's sake-pick up the freaking ball and run already!
2. It's pansy-ass. Sure, it's a bunch of guys running around hitting each other, but you rarely see any real damage. Where's the blood? Give me a good hockey fight-er, I mean game-any day.
3. The players are morons. Have you ever listened to those post-game interviews? I bet if you took any team and added up the IQs of all the players you still wouldn't get 200.
4. The cheerleaders. Okay, do I have to elaborate? No one looks that good without some major plastic surgery. (Yes, this is an envy thing).
5. The announcers drive me batty. Now, this is true with baseball, too. I prefer to watch a game with the sound off so I don't have to listen to stupid statistics. I mean, do I look like I care that this is the first time a guy named Steve ran more than 25 yards before getting tackled by a guy named Doug? No, I do not care. And no one else should either. Who the hell keeps track of this shit????? If it's a big deal I want to hear it. You know, the longest field goal by any player ever or something else along those lines. But I really don't care about how many Steves have been tackled by how many Dougs.
So, there you have my top five reasons for hating football. I could probably give you 10 more, but I'd have to actually watch a game to remind me and I'm not a masochist. Thank God Mike doesn't care much about college ball......
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